Saturday, January 25

This morning we managed a slow start in which we seemed to sync our feelings rather more than in the last few days. This, in itself, made me feel slightly better.

After breakfast Naa and Irma drove to Borgå to buy Naa a dress for her school prom. They got what they wanted at a shop that Auo had shown them last summer. I cleaned the shower room, which certainly needed it, and then showered.

I opened my laptop and cruised the news. I saw that the 1966 Batman tv series was finally being released on dvd and thought that I must order it from Amazon this weekend because Auo and I can watch it together and she will love it. Two seconds later I realised what I had just done and felt like I had just grabbed a live wire. Ouch. Fucking ouch.

I have been caught out like this a number of times this week.

Now I am looking at the large (and increasing) number of bouquets we have round the house. This one catches my eye, although I have no idea who it is from. The flowers range from the standardised florist-chosen bunches to the pink and yellow blossoms from people who knew what Auo was like. My favourite is a small, handpicked bunch from Sirkka that exactly captures something that Auo would have described as really cool.

In the afternoon Naa will leave for a date with Samppo. They will go and see Frozen, the movie that Naa and Auo were planning to see when they got back to Finland, and then go for a meal. Samppo is her dance partner at the prom in a few weeks time.